So I guess I should blog.
I've been intending to do this ever since I first discovered the Renegade Rebbetzin a few years ago. I could have been her. In fact there were even rumors that I was her. But alas, I am not. I am however a Rebbetzin, and a bit renegade. I also have a lot to say. The two things holding me back have been time and a name for my blog. I couldn't, for the life of me, come up with a title that was either not taken by a blog that I already follow, or that sounded like the title of a blog that I would follow. Here are a few of the (pathetic and more pathetic) names that I was considering:
1. La Rabbina -- Because I live in Miami which is really in South America (before this we lived in Perth, Australia which is really in South Africa.) But then I started to think -- have I no identity beyond Rebbetzinhood? And anyway, I really can't salsa dance.
2. Mammatzen -- it has the whole mom and Rebbetzin thing going on, but still says nothing about who I am. It also sounds too much like macho man and that's not exactly my theme song either. "Ma ma mama tzen -- I want to be a mamatzen..." Uhh.... that would be a no.
3. Rebbetzin Joe -- Allow me to explain. I thought this would work (for about 2 seconds - before I realized that gender confusion is not the way to go) because I really am an average joe. And that's my strength.
Here is how this played out last night after I got back form our monthly Rosh Chodesh meeting for women. Every month I arrange something creative and inspiring for our community and last night it was a presentation of Yoga and Judaism. The Rebbetzin who I arranged to give the class (whose name I have no permission to publish, so I won't) gave an amazing talk about her personal journey and her creation of Jewgal -- Jewgal.com (that, I think she would want me to publish). This was followed by a practical class where among other things we formed letters of the aleph bet with our bodies and connected to Gd and each other in a very profound way. So I came home so inspired and in awe of this woman and her creation.
Me: What's my thing?
Husband: What do you mean?
Me: Whats my thing. She does this Yoga and Judaism thing. What do I do?
Hus: Do you really want to know?
Hus: You write. I don't know why you don't write more.
Me: Probably because we have three kids under the age of 5.
Hus: Ok, but that's what you do. You can write.
Me: Yes, but so many people can write. What do I write about? That's the important part.
Hus: But that's just it, you can write about anything. You always have something to say.
Me: So I'm opinionated?
Hus: No, I'm just saying that you always have a comment. On everything.
Me: Hmm..... (thinking -- that's the same as opinionated in my humble opinion)
But then I got it. The fact that I'm not really good at one particular thing is what makes me able to be into everything. Mediocrity can be a good thing. I may not do anything amazingly well, but I pretty much do everything. I love life. I love trying new things. I love ideas and music and art and roller coasters and meeting new people.
And what I do more then anything is reflect. I see, I think, and I share.
You'll see. You'll get to know me. And once you do, you will probably see a bit of yourself.
4. Aspaklaria -- prism, looking glass, lens, a kind of mirror.
I was minding my own business tonight when the word Aspaklaria popped into my head. I thought -- hey, that's me.
Now all I need is a live-in nanny.